This is how i made a rap video, for my review of lookers vauxhall ellesmere port.
Use Google Bard to create a rhyming poem or song based on a certain topic.
bard.google.com
use eleven Labs to change text to voice -elevenlabs.io
use music trap to create music to go with the voice
Music video:
download stock videos from pexels and pixabay
use canva video creator to put videos in order and add images etc.
Heres the review video:
Emotional intelligence is the ability to perceive and control emotions, without impulsively acting upon them.
I also think of “emotional intelligence” as the ability to detach from the ego and your immediate, impulsive responses and choose a logical, kind or practical way to act:
If you take nothing else away from this post, please read those two bullet points above again!
Be aware of the stress response next time you get into a debate
For example, if you have any elderly parents or grandparents (just as an example from my own experience), who have always been told that being homosexual is “wrong”, they’ll usually complain or just be unable to watch the gay couples in Strictly Come Dancing.
If you question why they have a problem, they’ll rarely come up with a logical answer. They’ve been taught that being gay is wrong, so they’re body is producing stress hormones – which makes them feel pissed off for no logical reason.
If you don’t like someone or something, and you can’t explain why, chances are you’re being a dick!
This stress response can be heightened if your opinion is tied to your identity, or your group identity.
For example, if someone is a devout Tory, they’ll use “motivated reasoning” and any possible confirmation bias possible to defend Boris.
More info here – https://www.psychologytoday.com/gb/blog/how-risky-is-it-really/201007/why-changing-somebody-s-mind-or-yours-is-hard-do
This physiological reaction can also be roused when a global belief is threatened – for example, that the world is safe or ethical.
Tell people for example, that Nazi scientists were responsible for putting the first man on the moon and you may get some funny looks or reactions.
Inconvenient truths or questions can be another one. Tell people that lead water pipes are still around in the UK or that there’s a decent amount of evidence that fluoride in water is bad for the brain and nervous system – and there’s a decent chance people will get angry or ridicule you.
Recent study on fluoride here – https://bmcpublichealth.biomedcentral.com/articles/10.1186/s12889-020-09765-4
You sometimes see a similar reaction when someone lower down in a hierarchy, be it an official one or a unwritten one, makes a suggest to someone higher up- its often met with a kind of frustrated dismissal.
More of a logical fallacy – but it also crosses over into emotional intelligence.
People will for example, decide to behave in a certain way, and then later justify it by ignoring any information that contradicts theirbehaviour, whilst cherry picking any information that supports it.
For example – although I appreciate there’s now definitely a valid argument to ignore lockdown rules, people who choose to ignore lockdown in 2020, justified it because Sweden didn’t have one.
People who wanted to adhere to lockdown on the other hand – would point to the terrible situation that happened in Italy, and India.
Who is right – is up for debate I guess.
got kind of weird when my left wing mates started sharing Daily Mail articles though.
We’re all in different movies!
Confabulation is the creation of false memories, without intending to deceive or lie. Subconsciously, people’s egos or minds will create a false account of an event, that makes them look more favourable.
Being aware that you’ll do this on a subconscious level – can make you more conscious of bull sh!tting and making stuff up. Sometimes it’s like people are in different realities – if the event was on TV – they’d be completely different movies or TV shows!
You see a similar skewing of reality in real-time too. Arrogant people will skew reality to make out others are stupid or are at fault.
Similar to the stress response created when a pre-existing belief is threatened, if your own lifestyle choice is contradicted by someone, that can also create a stress response.
For example, I always get ear ache around Christmas for sticking to a strict diet (I’ve got IBD).
Sticking to a strict diet, makes other people feel bad about eating unhealthy food, and to compensate they’ll often mock or ridicule me.
In a similar fashion, I’ve been called obsessed with myself and all sorts, by people who don’t exercise, because I used to go to the gym in work every lunch time. (sorry, this section is turning into a bit of a personal vent/rant, ironically).
Being aware of this phenomenon, can help you to acknowledge your stress response to a threat, without acting upon it
Meditation is said to be one of the best way to build emotional intelligence. If you can learn to observe and detach from your thoughts, then you can choose not to act on them.
There are some good books that can help to, such as the Chimp Paradox or Dan Harris’ book – 10% Happier. If I remember rightly, he originally wanted to call the book – “The Voice in my head is an Ass Hole”.
The Dunning Kruger effect – relates to ill informed or incompetent people, thinking they’re great at something and being over confident. Like people who’ve never done MMA thinking they’d be great at it.
don’t be that guy:
Security threats are not just about tangible properties like your house or car, as there are also security threats online. In fact, there are several of them and they can attack your WordPress blogsite if you do not have the proper protection.
Your blogsite is considered as your home in the digital world. It contains everything that allows you to run a successful blog, which is needed to ensure that you keep your followers interested and entice more to read your posts. A security breach on your site could ruin its content and this could lead the entire blogsite to its downfall.
This is something that you do not want to happen, especially if you are using it for your business. You must secure your WordPress blog from these potential threats, just as you would keep your most valuable properties secured. You can do this by gaining awareness on the security risks that could put your blogsite in jeopardy. If you know the risks that you might be facing, you can plan ahead so they can be prevented and you wouldn’t have to deal with them.
We prepared an infographic that lists some of the most usual security attacks on WordPress sites that bloggers like you might face.
Get the list from our illustration below:
Surprised with the threats that might put your WordPress at risk? Learn more about how to secure your blogsite and other blogging tips at http://www.startbloggingonline.com/.
Place Y or N next to each virtue to see if you can improve etc.
It’s a great way to try not to be a bellend every day
Download the spreadsheet here:
You will see some noticeable changes in a month or two
It’s fantastic living in the moment; but I only seem to manage to do it when playing or competing in sport – when in ‘flow state‘.
In practical terms, it is very tricky to be 100% mindful at home, and especially in work…but I think it can be done.
You just need to be very organised; if you know everything you need to get done is ‘in a system’ that you adhere to everyday, then you can relax, or at least focus 100% on the task in hand.
If you don’t have a ‘system’, then you’re constantly worrying about whether or not you’ve missed something…
I’ve made an attempt to do this recently, here are some tips on both Mindfulness & organisation:
Meditate – focus on your breathing, and keep bringing the focus back, as the mind wanders (which it will).
If you can’t meditate for any reason, just be mindful whenever possible. For example; when typing, focus on the feeling of the keys when you touch them.
So you finally ‘woke up’, you can see through all the marketing, the consumerism and the general BS that drives most of the economy.
But rather than feeling liberated and freed, you’re stuck in this kind-of cynical and depressing middle-ground.
So next step, you start meditating and going to yoga class. To take things to the next level you start researching online and hear about all the yoga retreats that you can attend, and even read about ayahuasca retreats tripadvisor.
Ayahuasca, if you haven’t heard, is a herbal ‘drink’ that is often used by indigenous tribes in Peru. It has been touted by the likes of former CNN reporter Amber Lyons as a cure (for want of a better word) for mental health problems including anxiety.
As good as this sounds, unless you have a spare grand or two floating round in your savings account, a trip to Peru to speak to ‘Mother Ayahuasca’ is probably not on the cards. Other ironically expensive Buddhist-treats including flotation tanks, are beyond the budget of many of us too. So if you can’t afford to buy into the ‘enlightenment industry’, what can you do?
Flotation Tanks
You can learn more about them by watching this documentary:
American comedian, and martial artist Joe Rogan has one is his basement. But he’s rich, and I am not.
Here is an alternative, which I’ve found a lot more effective for sensory deprivation than a floatation tank. Although, you will look proper mental.
Listening to white noise on it’s own, with sound proof ear phones is enough on its own, to normally produce hallucinations etc, due to the impact of sensory deprivation. Add the weird white-eye-mask to this, and you’ll feel ‘bodyless’ in about 20 mins.
Ayahuasca
Whilst ‘Mother Ayahuasca’ possesses the female energy, San Pedro and Peyote cactuses posses the male.
You can’t use San Pedro or Peyote in the UK 😦
You can however get an Easy Jet flight over to Amsterdam, and buy and use Peyote or San Pedro legally. I have never done this myself, so cannot tout for the quality etc of what you can buy, but do feel it necessary to emphasise the importance of site and setting at this point. Don’t use it in the cheapest hotel you can find in Amsterdam. I’d recommend reading up and making some enquiries on Reddit.
So I just watched this Ted ex video –
This screenshot pretty much summarises the take-away message form the talk:
Do these things for 21 days, and we should all be wonderfully happy…so here goes:
My piglet
2. My next door neighbour being a plumber after the sink decided to explode this evening.
3. My wife being an ace Mum
2. Journaling – I guess that’s what I’m doing now
3. Exercise – done today in work
4. Meditation – will do the ‘headspace meditation’ for 10 minutes on youtube after this
5. Small Acts of Kindness – ah hell, will have to find something nice to do before i go to bed!
Having being brought up under the giant shadow created by, and constantly compared to Graeme ‘The Rock’ Sutcliffe, competitive parents and parenting has long been something that annoys me greatly.
Want to make your child feel not good enough?
Then quote your Mum-friends comments to your own children, and paraphrase their totally genuine anecdotes about how great their children are…and how your child must do better
Want to make your friends feel shyte?
Then tell them how great your child is, how they came 1st in every exam ever and are destined to be the next saviour of the free-world.
This in turn will no doubt lead said-friend to evaluate their child’s relative short-comings and pile tonnes of pressure on to their yet-to-fully-develop shoulders, so that they may then bask in the vicarious success of their own offspring when this fantastic parenting technique starts to pay off.
I’m working on some default responses for when a parent attempts to passive-aggressively put-down my child…these include:
“oh wow! your child is amazing! please tell me more…”
“Go away before I punch you in the throat”
Obviously, it’s best not to react to any type of boasting. It’s generally a sign of insecurity on the part of the person doing the bragging.
Just see it for what it is – a knobhead move
On a slight tangent – there’s a pretty cool article here – If you want your child to perform well at Sport:
Based on psychological research, the three healthiest statements moms and dads can make as [kids] perform are:
Before the Competition:
Have fun.
Play hard.
I love you.
After the competition:
Did you have fun?
I’m proud of you.
I love you.
Now I realise that TV producers find the biggest morons possible to make these shows more ‘entertaining’, and that the likes of Joey Essex pretend to be thick as pig-poo just to market themselves – for example by pretending he can’t tell the time – you didn’t believe that one did you?
Even with this awareness, watching horror/comedy programmes like TOWIE and Made In Chelsea is rotting your soul.
But Why?
Jealously!
Even though every philosophical book and self-help book tells us not to compare ourselves to others, we can’t help it. Jealously is regarded as a secondary emotion. Triggered by anger or fear. In this case, we all tend to get angry by watching a group of idiots, live amazing lifestyles that are way beyond most of us.
This ‘unfair treatment’ makes us angry – we work hard all week, and we can only dream of a lifestyle like that – unless we take out a ruck of loans that is. Don’t do that.
Anger at what we perceive as unfair treatment, such as unequal-pay for doing the exact same job as someone else, is such an instinctive reaction, that even monkeys display it:
The only remedy to this anger is – not to watch the tripe in the first place, and find some intelligent friends who can see through the ‘consumerism culture’ and can enjoy doing things that don’t cost any money. Like blogging.
Disclaimer – don’t actually do any of this stuff (but it is the kind of thing to expect on a building site)
1. Don’t worry about where you put anything. There is officially no official place to leave equipment; in fact, you’ll spend 60% of your time, running around looking for a bucket for mortar
2. If you worry about health & safety people will either presume you are a some kind of snob or an aristocrat.
It is common for brickies to leave bricks for example, standing upright, on the edge of walls above you and it is also common practice to leave as much crap as possible, including packaging, broken bricks and cable ties strewn across the scaffolding for people to trip over
3. Say “f*cking” every other word
4. Establish yourself as the alpha male as soon as possible by being the first to take your top off at any glimpse of sunshine, and by shouting the loudest during the ‘banter’
5. Eat pies & pasties, smoke 20 cigarettes per break, and then tell the middle-class guy that his hemp protein powder is bad for him and going to destroy his kidneys. In fact, being a builder gives you superior knowledge and life-experience, so be sure to put across your strong opinions on nutrition, education and politics 🙂
6. If the boss tells you off, just say “I’m really sorry la, won’t do it again”. He will love you forever as most apprentices can not take feedback at all (feedback = getting a bollocking).
7. Lift exclusively with your back. People who lift with their legs are also presumed a ‘posh bellend’
8. At break, talk about how hard your mates are, and smoke just inside the door of the portacabin to ensure that it is completely ‘hotboxed’ with tobacco.
It’s important that you are seen either smoking, or using a gambling app on your phone.
9. If you don’t smoke, it is assumed that you are some kind of shifty bugger
10. Never ask anyone’s name, or introduce yourself; it’s just not done. Call the person “la” and “mate” until you know their life story and it’s too awkward to ask their name
11. If the boss ever has to go off site somewhere, stop all work immediately
12. Once you are an established brickie, it is important to remove your hard-hat whenever the site manager is out of sight
13. Try and pretend you’re interested when the older brickies tell you stories about hod carrying, and saying stuff like “when I was your age…” and “you don’t know you’re born kid”; whatever that means
14. Pay someone to spread a rumour that you once killed a gorilla with an uppercut. Or something similar. This will make you less of a target for pranks and the high-brow banter
15. Stop watching documentaries and QI, and make sure your ‘read’ the Daily Sport and Star, just so you can hold a conversation with one of your associates. It is crucial that you hold aggressive right-wing opinions that are reliably informed by tabloid newspapers.
16. Be grateful for being given a chance. Many people, in many types of work, never get chance to put their qualifications into practice
17. “Bucket of sh!te” = bucket of mortar
18. Energy drinks are compulsory for under 35s. If you don’t have an energy drink and 5 cigarettes in the morning, you’ll be deemed an outsider.
19. “Customer Service” is not a known term. Once the job’s done, it’s done.
20. Always rub your chin 3 times before quoting a price
21. Aggression is the go-to emotional state for any good tradesman, whenever conflict, misunderstanding or frustration occur. The more aggressive you are, the better tradesman you become
22. Passing the buck is an art form on the building site. Just don’t expect anyone to know what ‘passing the buck’ actually means.
23. Crack open a can of beer as soon as you get in the car to drive home*
*Don’t actually do this. Although this did happen regularly when I was lift-sharing
A poem about the great men of the building site
O brickie oh brickie what will it be?
A tea with 3 sugars plus an extortionate fee,
A red bull with 5 fags is the fuel that we need, to lay those bricks 4 u at an exceptional speed,
Ale for us, no yoga or weed,
6 pints in town, its the way that we breed.
Cash in hand for our holiday in the sun,
No receipt 4 u tho its not how its done.
Customer service is our number 1 aim,
But if anything goes wrong, its the previous workman that’s ta blame
Actual Tips for your first day on the job:
A lot of the youngsters that I worked with were incredibly defensive. If you can be humble, say sorry and that you’ll do that or try harder next time, you will stand out a mile as a good worker. If you actually do some work as well. Try and get the punters/customers to like you as well by smiling and being polite. Again you will stand out a mile.
Small Business Dad 